Hey all. I would just like to get one thing off my chest and rant about it. I realised that my article, written about my squad, was not approved cos they deemed my article to be shooting the CIs. A myriad of emotions flow through my head at this point, and I'll do well to have a civil thought in my head about this matter when I get to the end of this post.
Firstly, who the hell do you think you are? No one in hell rejects my article. I'm sorry if this comes across as me being haolian, but I take a huge amount of pride in my work. When my article gets rejected, normally I feel a little disappointed but to get my work rejected cos two high-and-mighty ASSHOLES feel I'm trying to use that opportunity to shoot the CIs, is a damn bitter pill to swallow. You want me to redo my article. To omit any part that is unfavourable in your eyes. Here's my answer. HELL NO. I don't care who the hell you think you are. You can demote me. You can take my CCA points away. I don't care. I'm not changing ANY part of my article just cos you think it casts a bad light onto others. Namely yourself. I don't care if you're reading this. You can confront me, but I won't back down. If you are reading this, it's either you close this screen NOW, to save your pride and face, or you read on.
If you had the guts to tell me to my face to redo my article, I'd have asked you to shove it. I don't care about the ramnifications of this, I'm gonna give you a piece of my mind. Everyone is entitled to their opinion. So am I. I write down what I've observed. I don't distort the truth in my writing. Not when it comes to such stuff. If you have the guts to tell me what I write aint true, I'll show you a bad liar. To want to put on false fronts is just like a fake Van Gogh painting. Yeah it looks nice, but is it REAL? The answer is no. No matter how much one tries to hide the truths, there'll come a day when everything done in the dark will come to light. If you don't want people to bring up the ugly side of things, then there shouldnt have been an ugly side to start with. You reap what you sow. Don't get me wrong. This aint a case of a dog biting the hand that feeds it, but it's a case of comeuppance.
No matter how hard you try to suppress the truth, I'll guarantee that it'll come back to bite you in the ass. Painting a false picture of harmony and "all's well" is equal to being a hypocrite. This is not a show. You cant rewrite history at a whim. Don't force my hand into writing or changing anything that I believe it. Cos I wont do it. No one tells me to compromise my principles and my beliefs. You can do all you want to force my hand. But I'll NEVER rewrite my article. If you want things to turn ugly, two can play at that game.
Don't censor out stuff that you feel is unacceptable just cos you don't feel the same way. We're living in a democratic society. There is NO restriction when it comes to freedom of speech. If you think you have the right to do so just cos you have the higher rank, well then Saddam is in Heaven right now. Don't be a hypocrite. You disgust me. Rank doesnt mean shit. It's a piece of cloth I can buy for 2bucks.
If you insist on me changing anything, I'd rather you not publish it. I won't bend my principles just cos you deem fit. I stand up for what I believe in. I write what I observe. You have the right to force me to do things, but there's a limit to what you can do. Force my hand, and I'll make sure by the time I'm through with you, you'll never show your face in NCHS AGAIN. I wont back down from this. I'll never change my article. I'll never rewrite it. This kind of people who make life difficult just cos it'll be easy to watch people squirm and die, just totally disgusts me. You preach about democracy and having a good leadership style. Well frankly yours is like Stalin and Hitler combined. The communist belief is to always give a good picture even when things are not good. Hitler's style is totally dictatorial, always wanting his way.
All these are just my opinions. I don't care what consequences I might suffer. I'll gain much more from standing up for what I believe in. This is Dan signing off.
P.S Food for thought. Hitler had only one testicle.
Hey all. For now, 2007 has gotten off to a pretty mundane start. Everyday's kinda filled with the same stuff. School, homework, teachers, tuition blablabla. Anyway, I just wanna talk about NP for now. I wanna address the issues that for a long while, I've been avoiding or pushing to the back of my mind.
Firstly, is the POP. I know this will strike a raw nerve with those NP squadmates reading this. Let's not hide from it. Let's face up to the facts. Pretty soon, we'll be passing out and our four year tenure in NPCC will come to a end for most of us. Everyone's feeling sad and downcast about that. I am too. But should we just focus on the bleakness of that scenario? Or should we look back with pride and happiness at the last four years? I believe that I speak for all of us when I say that the last four years has been a blast and that it damn sure isn't a waste of time. But there must be an end to all good things, likewise our time together. I cannot state the importance of all of you in my life, and I hope you guys had a great time while our lives intertwined for this four short but sweet years. All of you have made a big impact in my life.
Secondly, I would like to give my thoughts on the upcoming staff sergeant promotion test. J Quek's MSN nick goes something like this. "jt says mr tien says ssgt promotion test 'll be held before end of jan". I realize that my chances of promotion are next to none. I look around me, and my fellow sergeants are mostly on par with me in drills and theory stuff, but I know I'll lose out big time when it comes to campcraft. I know my campcraft, from Sec 1 till now, is horrible, terrible and incorrigible. I have to be realistic, for its high time I woke up from my dreamland. I'm not of a good enough standard to be promoted.
Once upon a time, I thought I was better than the rest. I thought I was the best. I didnt think too highly of my squadmates. Now, being around them for close to four years, I have to eat my thoughts. I recognize that they are much better. I know I've lost out to the best, both in character and in practicality. I'll never have the hands-on skills that they have. It took me long enough to know that, but gone is the superior complex and the jealousy and the egoism.
Furthermore, my previous haughtiness and lack of respect for my squadmates have not given the CIs the best impression of me. I know many still outwardly praise me but inwardly think I'm a no good asshole. Also, this promotion is a big one. Therefore, Maam J will have to discuss with the TOs and other CIs who to promote. With some of my squadmates going to get backing from HO Derrick, I know my chances are less than 10% to be honest. Don't get me wrong, I'm not being negative, I'm just being practical.
Gone are the days in which I'll be over-confident or kid myself that I'm that damn good. I know I'm not. I'm over that. Yes, I want to get promoted. I'd love to. But I've said this many a time. It hurts to wanna do so much and wanna accomplish so much, but not having the chances to do so. Having said that, there are many obstacles to overcome. I know that. But this is my pledge. I'll try my very best, put in my utmost dedication to NP no matter what. After that, what happens happens. For no one can close the doors that God opens. And only He knows the plans He has in store for me. Plans that wont harm me, but prosper me. I'll put my faith in that. No matter what, I wont bear any grudges or feel jealous about anything. If I lose out in getting that promotion, then I'll take heart in the fact that I'm losing out the very best people.
Anyway, getting promoted means the shortlist for SI/CI rank is getting shorter. I told myself a long time ago, when I saw the type of people who got that rank. I told myself I'd forbid myself from getting that rank if it'll give me such pride and cockiness (I'm leaving Maam J and HO Derrick outta this). I was disappointed in the type of people that got the rank. For almost all who got the rank got it through endless bootlicking and in my impression, have never deserved the rank. In the immortal words of Maam J,"Rank is what you get. Respect is what you earn".My sentiments exactly. I would much rather earn the respect as a sergeant than become a CI that nobody looks up to outside of NP. At the end of my tenure in NP, I wanna leave with my head held high, able to tell myself that I have not compromised on my principles and character for personal gain. I wanna leave with my integrity and dignity intact. For at the end of all this, all that's reflected of NP is gonna be a rank and a CCA grade. But what becomes of my dignity and integrity, lasts forever.
Promotion is something I WANT. It isnt something I NEED. There's a difference. So if I get it, I'll be happy but I wont become filled with pride. But if don't, I wont eat my heart out. There are many other things in the world that's worth really striving for. This isnt one of them.
I know this post'll probably get loadsa opinions. But one thing is true. I speak from the bottom of my heart. You guys can post all the opinions, but nothing's gonna change mine. Till the next time, this is Dan signing off.
reflections of 2006
Hey all. First up, would just like to wish one and all a Blessed New Year. I hope those reading will go with me down this memory lane and reflect on what has been in the past year.
The year of 2006 will forever be remembered by me as a breakthrough year in many ways. It's the year I found my passion for NP, the year I first dedicated time to serve in an area, the year I grew up the most spiritually. Firstly, the more mundane stuff.
I would like to thank my beloved squad 4 for igniting my passion for NP. I remember that at the end of 2005, I was feeling disillusioned and unhappy at the people I found in NP, the type of people who were allowed to be in authoritative positions but displayed sucky attitude since forever. I was wondering why these people would get a chance to have a major say in NP instead of others who had a much better attitude, who would then influence others to change their attitude as well. I cant say I got my answer, but as time passed I gained something much more valuable, true friendship. Through all my happiest times in NP, all my super lows, all my discouragement, there was one common denominator thru all of that. My squadmates, in one way or another, was always there. And as the months passed us by, we slowly took over NCO posts. It was then we pledged that no matter what, rank wouldnt divide us. It was then we pledged our friendship and dedication to one another. I started drawing strength not from myself, but from the unity of the squad. For the first time I saw what friendship truly should be like. The self-sacrifices, the selflessness, the utter togetherness. Once again I reiterate my belief. Through good times and bad, through bitterness and strife, through joys and sorrows, through trials and tribulations, we will be friends forever.
2006 was also the year I met many people. I got to know my juniors better (no joke about "z" allowed!), met new teachers, met new friends in church thru camp comm and junior camp, and really, the year just would not have been the same without them. I hope I also made a significant impact in their lives like they have made one in mine. Oh and also my OBS peeps! Haha nearly forgot. I thank you for walking with me in the past year. All of you have made life bearable just by walking with me.
2006 was the year I stepped out more. I started talking more, and stepping outta my comfort zone to go for OBS and to serve in camp comm really helped me grow as a person. But along with the talking more came a brash and cocksure attitude. It wasnt apparent at first but as the months passed us by, I became more of a "suaner" than an encourager. I became a person who was a major asshole in school but a nice guy at home, behind the com and thru sms. That was super hypocritical. Many a time I wanted to put a stop to it, be a nice guy throughout the day in whatever I did, but actions speak louder than words. It's really one thing I regret totally. My sucky attitude, all cos I didnt wanna let people trample on my head, but I forgot a basic logic. Treat people the way you want them to treat you. For those whom I have hurt in one way or another with my words, actions or thoughtlessness, I seek your forgiveness. At any point in the coming year, use this to remind me whenever I step outta line again. I wanna experience humility and phase out the hypocrisy from my life. So once again, I'm sorry to those I've unwittingly hurt with my cutting remarks and cursing and thoughtless actions. Help me to be a better person. Thank you.
In the UK, the Queen gives out New Year Honours. I wanna do it too, for I wanna spell out some people who have meant alot to me and been an integral part of the last year. Firstly, sorry to those whose names I've missed out. I hope these people realize how much they mean to me.
Best person to debate with -- Jun Ting
Mentor -- Kai Feng
Best bunch of friends -- Squad 4
Best "suanee" -- Jsister-Jin-Jlaw
Greatest cousin -- Stan
Best reality tv companion -- Kar Liang
Best girl-friend -- Baba
Nicest boss -- Cai Ying
Cutest guy -- Thaddeus
Best brother -- John abruzzi
Most meaningful,un cliche MSN convos -- Mei Ching
Best block of wood -- Hwee Siang
Best CGL --Mich Tia
Best church buddy -- Jeremy
The people I crapped with throughout the year -- Jun De, Aaron, NYY, Larry, Joe
Best bomb -- Sam Chan
Nicest guy -- Clement Sim (CFC rawks. Haha)
Evangelist of the year -- Meiqi, Huiting
Best "suaner" -- Des, Ken
Best maam -- Jocelyn maam
Best aunt-tea -- Jsister-Jin-Jlaw
Best jie -- VK
Most confused person -- Jocelyn Q, Wei Siang
Craziest gal pal -- Mei Ching (you deserve this cos you're the only person I know so crazy over Dean Geyer *free advert*.)
Most photogenic -- Clement Sim (by request of Ms Foong)
Best baker -- Mei Ching
Most ups-and-downs-but-still-great-friend -- Baba (NO MORE 98.7!!)
Nicest lau ah pek -- Jun Ting
Best encouragers -- Squad 4
Coolest bunch of peeps -- Squad 4
Best lover of a piece o' wood -- Jocelyn
Best ALAF kia -- Wei Han
Best Man U fan --Wei Han, Joe, Dan (That's right I'm giving myself an award.)
Nicest African -- Wei Han
And that's about all. Sorry to those whom I've missed out. Once again, have a blessed and God-filled new year 2007!This is Dan signing off.
